I love date night with my husband!  His parents make sure that we are able to get out once a week if they can.  I think that it is such a need for marriages to have this date night.. it’s so easy to get lost in the work week and the craziness of life that you forget to pursue each other.. you end up becoming roommates rather then lovers.

I love my husband more then anything and never want to hurt him or our children.  And the best way to hurt them both is to stop pursuing him.  Remember back to when you first started to date your husband/wife.. the butterflies when they would touch your hand.. the excitement of maybe getting that kiss.. life around you would just freeze and nothing else would matter because you were with the one you loved.. it is so easy to become entangled with the children, bills, house hold chores, keeping everyone else around you happy.. and when you or your spouse gets home you have nothing left… you are exhausted and just want to rest.. why should you have to be the one pursuing when really if they loved you enough they would show some effort..

I think this comes down to pride..for me anyways.. I know that I expect more from Joshua when in reality I have done nothing towards him.  I expect him to make the first move.  If he shows no effort then why should I.. and right there is the death of the marriage if I let it go..  Its not that I am not attracted to him or don’t want to make out.. my pride literally holds me hostage.. when I let it..

What is holding you back?  What can you do to bring back the romance?  When the kids are in bed change your evening routine.. I believe that routines can smother out the flame.  Don’t let your pride, or what ever it is that holds you back, be the reason you go from lovers to roommates.

Romans 12:10: Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

United: Tear down the walls

I was just thinking about how blessed I am with my family.. pondering what to blog about.. and then this phrase popped into my mind.  We see it stitched on pillows, hung up in picture frames, or decorating a warm smelling candle.  “Home is where the heart is”

Proverbs 27:19 “As water reflects a face, so a man’s heart reflects the man”

Matthew 6:21 “Where ever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be”

What does my heart reflect?  Where is my treasure?

This past weekend Joshua had the honor of performing a funeral or what we call a celebration of life..  As this phrase “home is where the heart is” came from my lips, I couldn’t help but think about how Chris is now where his heart was… home.

When my time comes to and end here on earth.. what will people say about me?  “She really loved her children.”  “She was a great wife.”  “She was a wonder friend.”  Sure those are great and something every mother, wife, and friend would want to hear.. But is that where my heart was?  Was my family my treasure.  Does my heart reflect the love of Jesus?

As I sit this morning sipping my coffee, having an english muffin with peanut butter, and the boys fighting, laughing, crying, and playing in the other room, I think of all the things I have been blessed with… not just the “regulars”… but the things that one would not think of unless faced with a trial or tragedy.

I was looking through photos of friends and and their families…seeing how each family had different trials they had to work with or recent tragedies they have faced… and just got hit in the gut at how ungrateful I am sometimes… for the little things

The frustration I get when Malachi, our oldest, climbs over or opens a gate and gets into things he shouldn’t.. I’m thankful that he can climb.  Or when he just keeps asking and asking and asking for the same thing over and over and over again.. I am thankful he can talk.

How many times are we just so ungrateful for the things that would change our whole world if it were different…

You speak down to your wife/husband constantly bickering and degrading them…then you find out they have a life altering illness.. how do your words change?

You are constantly annoyed with your children… then a horrible accident happens and they are no longer with you… who are you annoyed with now?

Its true that trials and tragedies are going to come your way…but before they do.. think about what you do have…and be thankful for them now…

So I just face booked a thought on how my mind is flying but I’m really just running in circles.. nothing is getting accomplished…idleness…

Amos 6:5  You sing idle songs to the sound of the harp…

Proverbs 12:11  Hard work means prosperity; only fools idle away their time.

Matthew 12:36  And I tell you this, that you must give an account on judgment day of every idle word you speak.

After I wrote what I thought was just a silly thought… I got hit with that stomach in your throat feeling… I am being idle…

I have a purpose… God wants to use me for something other than just standing with my husband, raising our children and keeping a home… I have lost my vision… I have found it so easy to hide behind my “responsibilities” and to some how dodge the ministry aspect of my life… I’m hiding behind our children… their schedule… cleaning the house… and really anything I can subconsciously think of, to not have to stretch myself further in Christ.  I’m not saying that being a wife and mother isn’t a ministry… I’m saying that I am knowingly ignoring the fact that God wants to use me further.. and I am scared to let him in and expose who I really am on the inside…

Hey everyone, sorry that I dropped off the face of the earth for a while…just need to regroup I guess:)

I have been thinking about what to write and as I was reading this morning in Matthew I came across this verse “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries.  Today’s trouble is enough for today.” Matthew 6:34  This really caught my hearts attention.

If you talk to people around me you will come to find that I love to make lists!  Lists of things to do for that day, things we need to buy, things I need to pack, things that I would like to get done, things that should get done, and the list goes on.  I personally find that they help keep me on track for that day.  These list don’t cause me to worry.  But one list that still kind of makes me worry, and used to consume me, is the list of bills…  This was my weakness… and Satin was using it.

I would lie awake at night just being consumed with making the lists in my head about what we need to pay that week and what is coming up and what is going to be owed and bla bla bla.  My heart would start to race and my mind felt like I was riding the Zipper at the fair.  I would literally become sick to my stomach with worry.  Writing this I still remember the feeling.  I was being consumed by worry, that turned into fear, which caused my heart to doubt.

“…Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs, and he will give you all you need from day to day if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.” Matthew 6:32-33

I was living for this world.  I’m not saying that we don’t need to be concerned about our bills, money situations, or what ever it is that consumes you.  But we need to not worry about them.  Live one day at a time.   Focus on Jesus and be a good steward of what he has given you today and He’ll take care of your tomorrow.